This is my house, and I should have laid down he ground rules that said he was to knock on the front door just like any other houseguest. Houseguests do not help themselves to the food in my refrigerator. This is him living by the old rules as if this were his home, which it is not.

That is not to say that you cannot have a relationship with your ex, but it has to be radically different from the one you had while married

These ground rules are meant to protect you and prevent any situations that could lead to an upset. The less you have to do with your ex, the better. There are women who cannot have their exes in their lives for any reason other than the children.

Their emotional ties to their exes are still strong, and they need to isolate themselves in order to break those ties

• Communicate with your ex via writing and/or brief phone calls. Keep all communication limited to only what is necessary for the kids or legal matters.
• When an upset is looming or when your ex starts to speak to you in inappropriate ways, stop the conversation and hang up or walk away. Let your ex know this new ground rule: you will speak to one another in respectful ways and will not tolerate anything else or the conversation is over.
• Ensure that your home is just that: your home. It is not a place to hang out with the kids. Читать далее →